Does love forgive distance? – Last minute magazine news

This question is on the minds of lovers of those who have had to move to a different country for work or who have graduated from a university in a different city. Does distance hinder love? This is something that even romantic people who believe that love knows no obstacle are skeptical. Couple and family therapist psychologist Aye Yannick: “Distance reduces communication. However, communication is healing. When you get out of the bedroom, all relationships become friends. “

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We are discussing an important topic in our press conference. Is the kilometer an obstacle to love? That’s because of Kylie Minogue’s (53) relationship, which was featured on the magazine’s agenda last week. Deciding to return from England to her hometown Australia, where she has lived for 30 years, the artist has announced that her boyfriend Paul Solomon, 47, will be in England and that their love will continue for a long time. We discussed the relationship of this couple, who have been together for 3.5 years.

After being away for a while, is it possible for two people living on two different continents and in different time zones to maintain a relationship? The team romantics argued that love would overcome any difficulty. For realists, it makes no sense to have a relationship without touching it. In fact, our director, Asli, says that, in her own words, she talked to her husband, with whom she had lived for 100 years, during her university years: ” Stayed here. I loved it, yet I said, ‘It’s hard for me to survive here without a girlfriend for years.’ What does it mean to be in love if you don’t spend time together, don’t touch, have fun or have a hard time together? Of course he didn’t. It’s different now, but it wasn’t possible then. “

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Couple and family therapist psychologist Aye Yannick agrees … “Distance creates a disruptive effect on emotional relationships. Relationships are already vulnerable to rifts because of external influences. And they want to be fed to be driven. When we are bad, when we are sick, when we are happy, we want the person in our relationship. Therefore, after a while, long-distance relationships go after. Of course, there is no law that says that all distance relationships end. But when we look at the general, we see that this kind of relationship is not going to go very well. “

‘It is not enough to talk’

Like many of us, I think there is no need to disconnect people from a distance when there are many means and methods of communication. But couple therapist Aye Yannick argues that warm communication doesn’t have the same effect, especially in relationships, and says, “Conversely, the phone is a very dangerous tool in communication. Communication is not just words. We communicate with our facial expressions, our emotional responses.” When the parties look each other in the eye, they act differently according to the phone and the screen. For example, a fight on the phone does not actually end because the parties usually want to communicate after such a discussion. They can hug each other, they can kiss. It is not enough to talk alone for a relationship. Also, the person says ‘My dear, my love’ on the phone, but in good or bad moments he is not with you, if there is no sharing between you, it causes anger over time.

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As such, teams begin to find different social environments and support systems over time and shares decline. In short, when distance interferes, it opens the way for others to enter. In fact, the nightmare of distant couples has to be deceived… “In that moment of good or bad, others begin to live with you. Emotions tend to change over time. Because we want to be with the one who nourishes us, we tend to keep in touch that keeps us warm “, says Aye Yannick:” Distance weakens communication. Not just sexual, sensual; In other cases, too, communication is declining … If you’re alone on an island like Robinson Crusoe, you’re stuck because there’s no communication. But there is a lot of communication in life, especially in the lives of celebrities. This leads to intimacy with other people. And that’s normal. “

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‘Send gift’

“But what is the relationship without sex?” I ask. He says the area covered by sex in relationships is wider among young people, and decreases with age, adding that Yannick: “Sex is not just about sex. Communication is healing. Sexual intercourse heals the relationship after a major conflict. When you get out of the bedroom, all relationships turn into friendships.

What will Minogue tell his client, I ask? “It doesn’t last day or night, leave the same continent. It may be easy to maintain some strong ties in different cities, but it is difficult in two different countries, “he said

Of course, those who read the news and who have a distant relationship should not be upset. Experts say that arranging romantic digital meetings via video, meeting face to face at least every 3 months and sending flowers or gifts to your girlfriend by making small surprises can save the relationship.

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