The first holiday without my mother – Hussein Turhan, new message

When I arrived in Eskiেehir with an appointment in February 2004, I made a promise to myself.

“If I spend one religious holiday in Eskiehir, I must spend the other in Gumshun”!

I was true to that promise as long as my parents lived.

I can’t forget our 13-14 hour vacation trip from Eskişehir to Gümüşhane.

We did not understand how the road ended when we became pregnant parents.

Being without my mother for the first time this holiday, my memory took me on a mental journey to Eskisehire.

As the holidays drew to a close, a sweet crowd would break out in our house, just like any other house.

Especially if we are going to Gumshan, we will prepare a few days in advance, buy gifts and we will leave.

My wife’s detailed research, “Hüseyin, your mother likes it” sentences will be our holiday shopping salt.

She will try very hard to get what I want with my mother!

As the holidays draw to a close …

“We’re coming, Mom. Do you have a request?” “The health of your soul. I have no desire. You come safely” still ringing in my ears. When I knew about our future, the voices on the phone would change, and I would start flying happy pigeons in it.

After all, her mother’s heart.

When we reached Gumushan in the evening after traveling for hours on end, the fatigue of our journey was gone when my mother opened her arms and hugged us and kissed us on the cheek saying “My dear my dear”.

Isn’t there an invitation to the table you prepared for us, saying, “You came from the street, you are hungry” …

Water pastries, which he knows I love and stuffed cabbage rolls will be an essential dish at our banquet table.

What can I say …

In the village of Dortkonak.

On the morning of Eid, after the prayers in the mosque, our feast begins.

I will never forget that in the village of Dortkonak, my mother always gave the first tea to her friends who went to the mosque for my father’s morning prayers.

It was like a living cornucopia.

Coming to our bed in the morning on the day of the feast and saying ‘Come on baby, get up’ with your hair in your hands was like a touch of the morning air.

The day started with the clothes we wore on the holidays and we kissed them on the hand with the holiday pocket money.

We would go to Bekirli, İşbirli, Sallahlı and Kıran, respectively, and return home with bags of sugar in our hands at the end of the day.

What a beautiful day.

My mother

On holidays she would carry her four children under her wings, feed them, and clothe them.

Those days are so ingrained in my mind that my eyes get wet just thinking about them!


I am deeply sorry for the first vacation without my mother.

The rush to make breakfast for us on the morning of the feast floated before my eyes, my mother!

This holiday season, we have not been able to gather all the brothers and even the grandchildren and have the best breakfast of the year for the first time!

Nothing can replace you mom!

How can I miss the smell of our stove as it breathes into my lungs, the smoke of which mixes with the smoke of our morning and evening on holidays!

A thin pain under my gray hair.

The kids you left behind are trying to fly like doves with a broken wing, but they can’t fly on the sad holiday of Ramadan …

The festive days spent together in our childhood days, which were hidden behind a foggy glass, were a consolation for me, my brother Wonder and my older sister Hakimi and Hamiet.

Sometimes you come in our dreams and say something and disappear without finding you.

When you come to my dream, I wake up with a happiness inside me and a pain in my heart.

We are trying to get used to the first vacation without you.

Holidays are here without you.

A tasteless feast.

After five months of separation, I am at a tide between dreams and reality, past and future.

Whenever I hear the word mother or a sad song in my car, I always think of you. Most of the time, I can’t stop the trembling drops flowing behind my lashes.

You are, day is evening, life is mortal.

If you are not an orphan, hug hard! Kisses, the smell of your mother, and the contents of your heart.

Have mercy on my mother and all the mothers who died during the precious holidays …

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