Acknowledging that you have a healed wound is the first step in the healing process. At present, you can find the source of problems and answers by inviting your child to a psychotherapy session. With therapy, it is possible for your child to communicate with himself and empathize with his or her unmet needs. This type of approach provides a functional improvement in your relationships and communication methods.
In some situations, your reactions may seem too intense or even unreasonable to other people; Similarly, in situations where you don’t pay much attention, the other side can be greatly affected. Our ‘extreme’ reactions to what is happening today stem from the triggering of experiences and emotions that we know from childhood and sometimes adolescence, when emotions are felt very intensely and internally without any adult filter. What we feel can sometimes return to a happy memory from our childhood, and can sometimes return to a memory where we have felt sad, lonely and helpless. Although some of us with a strong adult inner voice can overcome this more easily; Some of us find it difficult to strike a balance between a child’s inner cry or an internal critical or punitive voice from their parents.
An adopted method in psychology; 0-8 years old, due to the uncontrolled internalization of what has been felt and observed and the emotions are felt very intensely without being able to convey them; Every event experienced during this period, which negatively affects the development of the person, can be triggered by the current experience. Often, people do not understand the causes of these acute triggers and over-reactions. Things that he doesn’t understand cause anxiety in people. From such a cycle; However, it is possible to get out of it by working on the inside and reflecting on your own childhood. A helpful part of psychotherapy is that it allows emotions to grow in a healthy way and indicates uncontrolled and painful levels of triggering.
Well, if I had a childhood with a lot of negative experiences between the ages of 0-8, or if I were the child of a family where the bonds were completely broken, would I really be able to balance today? When asked; My answer is a resounding yes, supported by scientific research and clinical observations. Man’s inner world can be rearranged according to his intentions. We can compare past injuries with injuries that occur when we fall. Although some of their scars go away over time, they need to actively intervene to heal the wounds that occur after some major accident. However, the scars can remain after treatment. It depends entirely on the duration, intensity and perception of the situation experienced by the individual. It is also curable for childhood trauma; However, it is possible to say that it may be in the form of a scar that does not hurt. If there are common points in the relational, social and communication problems you are currently facing, you can solve your childhood by working on it.
Every human being has three different traits. These; Child Self, Parent Self and Adult Self. The child himself is part of you that you are more emotional, rebellious, or undoubtedly consistent which reflects your childhood and incorporates the reactions of that time. The parental self is not actually me, it’s just the model and the interior. When a parent’s identity is revealed, you display characteristics such as your parent’s personality. Within the parents themselves, either a critical or defensive attitude is mainly displayed. For example; This is activation if you reflect on your partner’s behavior that you do not like as personality criticism, not on the basis of behavior, or if you shoot arrows of criticism even at the slightest mistake of your relatives. While walking outside about critical parental self, thinking that your loved one is cold and trying to wear a jacket, activates your protective parental ego. Although foster parents feel very innocent, someone who always cares for you and in some cases insists that whether you do something to protect yourself or not, over time, you can become a person with whom you are stressed and Feeling uncomfortable. Balance is always the solution in any situation. The child is more egocentric; We work with this tone when we are happy and normal. The adult self is an objective assessment of reality. Our adult self acts as a balance between the child’s own and the parent’s own intense, egocentric and emotional movement, which can be compelling. It considers the current and your social status.
They have a lot of people of their own parents who, as adults, they undoubtedly model cognitive distortions, stereotypes and old teachings as they model and practice internally. Have you ever wondered what attitudes and behaviors you apply today without questioning whether they can be right or wrong that do not serve you?
However, the childhood years leave a mark that shapes the character and determines how it relates and becomes. The sadness, discovery, and resentment that you have had since you were a child, these removed wounds become scarring at the end of psychotherapy and no longer affect them in the same way.